I liked how you included the fact that athletes use sensory deprivation. It related the topic better to the real world and showed how valuable sensory deprivation can be.

I really liked how you started your post with a strong fact like that it is undeniable that all humans need water. I think that you can state your opinions without using “I” so much, and I was able to get what […]

I thought your analysis of how the government responded to Tempest was very good

Great job introducing a third party! Your last sentence wraps up your essay very well by the way.

I really like how you gave us Bruno Latour’s point of view at the very beginning of the writing. The only thing that was wondering was your point of view on it. You had the “they say” but I didn’t understand wha […]

You chose a great quote and kept the summary concise! Just don’t forget about the they say, I say. In the beginning, you could say something along the lines of “many people cloud their judgement by allowing their […]

I thought that you related your object to Haraway’s message very well.

Overall, I thought this was written very well! The sentence, “She believes gender, social, race, and historical constitution cannot be the basis for unity, nothing about being a female binds to ‘women'” did a […]